So Much to Say: Part 2
Friday, October 19th, 2007
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I recently had the great pleasure of interviewing a Japanese architect (in English!) for an article about architecture. Again and again, he returned to a core fact of Japanese existence: nonverbal communication. He noted that, being Japanese, he conveys thoughts and feelings without words, a habit that ultimately caused an impasse in his marriage to a chatty American.
He nevertheless spoke to me for hours about his inner life. Out came a waterfall of words about insecurities and humiliations, wartime suffering, learning disabilities, divorces, tragic deaths, anger at a parent, and much more, all of it deeply moving. Unless I missed something, he didn’t employ nuance or indirection. He said quite clearly whatever what was on his mind. It makes sense that he has learned to do this after living in California for a half century. It also makes sense that he became chatty during an interview. But … he was so good at expressing his feelings! Could this have been the first time?
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Anecdote
So silent I when Love was by |
When I asked whether he thinks he still communicates nonverbally, he responded that because Japanese culture shaped him indelibly in his early years, he remains very much a nonverbal communicator. It’s a habit he can’t break. And he said I would know this if I ever lived with him (a possibility that we did not explore further!).
I did see his nonverbal side when I asked about his architecture. “It’s very difficult to verbalize and communicate,” he said. I’ve heard other architects be similarly reticent about their work; one told me that he designs precisely because he can’t put his creative impulses into words. So I asked the Japanese architect whether that’s what he meant. No, he said, referring once again to his ingrained habit of nonverbal communication.
The more he spoke, the more confused I felt about that concept.
Sweet Talk, Muddy Words, and the Naked Truth
Last week we began talking about 言葉 (kotoba: word, speech, language). If we look at expressions containing 言葉, maybe we’ll gain a better sense of how the Japanese view the art of conversation (or nonconversation, as the case may be). But first, let’s examine what English speakers say about the topic:
• Actions speak louder than words.
• A picture is worth a thousand words.
• An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows. (Dwight D. Eisenhower)
It would seem from these aphorisms as if English speakers look down on speech as so much fluff. With that established, we can look at comparable Japanese expressions:
言葉から実行に移る (kotoba kara jikkō ni utsuru: to change words into actions)
word (1st 2 chars.) + action (3rd and 4th chars., which break
down as reality + to act) + to move“Turning words into action”—certainly a familiar expression for English speakers, though “walking the talk” is the most current version.
言葉に甘える (kotoba ni amaeru: to accept an offer)
word + to be content
Here, 甘える is “to be content.” You may recognize 甘 (ama(i)) as “sweet,” as in 甘海老 (amaebi: sweet shrimp, sweet + shrimp (last 2 chars., which break down as sea + old, in an example of ateji)). It makes perfect sense to me that a welcome offer has a connection to sweetness. After all, English speakers refer to “sweetening the pot” or “sweetening the deal.”
言葉尻を捉える (kotobajiri o toraeru: to cavil at a person’s words) word + buttocks, tail end + to capture
In case you’re wondering (as I was!), “to cavil” means “to raise irritating and trivial objections,” or “to find fault with unnecessarily.” I found this sample sentence: “He finds something to cavil at in everything I say.” Perhaps that’s better than having him capture your buttocks, as apparently happens in Japan, according to the breakdown above! No, I guess that interpretation is not quite correct! In addition to “buttocks,” 尻 signifies “tail end.” So 言葉尻 means “end of a word.” (”Slip of the tongue” is another meaning.) I suppose “capturing” the “tail end” of a word is like pouncing on words or splitting hairs.
言葉を濁す (kotoba o nigosu: to be elusive, to make things less lucid on purpose, not to commit oneself) word + to muddy
English speakers refer to muddying the truth. (Oddly, the opposite of this is the “naked” truth!). In Japanese, you can muddy the actual words. (But are they clothed or not?)
Evasive Action
If we’re to examine expressions about words, we can’t simply consider those involving 言葉. We need to widen the investigation to include words that feature 言 without 葉. The kanji 言 means “word,” “to say,” or “speech” and has the following yomi: GEN, GON, i(u), and koto. Even though koto is a kun-yomi, it often appears in compounds. In such cases, 言 means “word,” according to Jack Halpern.
We found a dash of noncommittal behavior in 言葉を濁す (kotoba o nigosu: not to commit oneself). Here’s another great expression in the same vein:
言を左右にする (gen o sayū ni suru: to equivocate, be
noncommittal) word + left + rightA few notes about this expression:
• The noun 言 doesn’t have the kun-yomi koto here, as one would expect from a kanji flying solo. Instead, the expression uses the on-yomi GEN. Suddenly everything is backward—the kun-yomi koto is showing up in compounds, and the on-yomi is kicking into action for freestanding kanji!
• In an earlier blog, sayū imparted the feeling of going in all directions at once. In the expression above, sayū ni suru similarly gives the sense of dodging right, then left, in an effort to avoid being pinned down.
But that’s not the final word on evasion (a word that, in English, would curiously seem to be the opposite of “invasion” but isn’t). Check out this term:
言い抜け (iinuke: evasion, an excuse) to say + to slip out
One slips out of a tight spot by evading a question or making an excuse.
How to Use 言い抜け in a Sentence ….
Well, for the moment let’s evade further discussion (picking it up again next week) so we can enjoy today’s Verbal Logic Quiz!
By all means leave a comment … as long as there are plenty of sugary words and no caviling whatsoever!

October 20th, 2007 at 3:22 am
Great discussion on an abstract subject. Much easier to discuss something one can touch and see. Keep up the great work.
October 20th, 2007 at 9:35 am
Thanks so much. Very insightful, too (re. abstract vs. concrete discussions). I resolved a while back to stick with the concrete topics, and then … whoops! Leaves led me right to words! Oh, well! I’ll make my way back to the tangible/visible world eventually!
October 22nd, 2007 at 10:37 am
Eve,
I think your interpretation is wrong. Japanese are far, far more verbal than Americans. Every day in the life of Japanese is a series of verbal rituals. Many things that Americans would leave unsaid are verbalized in Japan. The so-called non-verbal communication is in fact, verbal. It involves picking up on subtle hints included in verbal rituals. It’s true that Americans are less senitive to these hints than Japanese. That’s why it often takes more words to get a feeling across with Americans.
As for the architect’s waterfall of words when he starting talking about his feelings–that is *typical* of Japanese. Japanese are much more verbal about their feelings than Americans. Every interview in Japanese begins with “`Please tell me your “sotchoku-na-kimochi”. Japanese are constantly expressing how happy, nervous, tired, shocked they are. They are better than Americans at describing their feelings because they are much more conscious of them.
Examples:
I remember seeing an interview with S. Oh about a baseball game in Taiwan. He said, “At first I was nervous, but it went alright, so now I am relieved.” Notice there is nothing said about the game. The answer is all about his feelings.
I was watching a US Movie here with subtitles. The American said, “That’s nice.” The subtitles said “I’m happy.”
When David Beckham was here he was asked, “HOW DO YOU FEEL, when you see these crowds coming out to see you?” He answered “It’s very exciting.” He didn’t answer the question!!! He described the situation. The Japanese expected to hear about his *PERSONAL FEELINGS*.
Japanese are much more verbal than Americans.
October 22nd, 2007 at 11:49 am
Hmm, well, I’m not sure I follow all the logic here. I was mainly advancing the architect’s point of view. My own view was mostly one of confusion. So I don’t quite see how I can be wrong in my “interpretation”!
Also, I’m not entirely sure how this turned into a “Japanese” vs. “American” kind of thing, as the level of interpersonal disclosure varies widely across the United States. But that’s another matter.
It seems that we’re talking about a few different things, and it might be good to keep them separate:
–being subtle and dropping hints (which can be both verbal and nonverbal)
–talking about basic feelings (happy, sad, shocked), which is another thing
–talking about deeply personal things (divorces and other types of family dysfunction), which is yet another
The last thing is what most surprised me in the architect’s behavior. When I’ve talked to Japanese people and have asked something as objective as their spouse’s name, I’ve gotten the sense that I’ve crossed a line–that private things need to remain private. And it doesn’t seem to me that a spouse’s name is such a private thing!
Anyway, I’m certainly not invested in my point of view (which, again, was mostly one of being confused!). It’s interesting to hear differing views, especially since someone else took me to task last week for this issue … and his view was opposite to yours!
I’d love to hear from a native speaker on this issue!
November 10th, 2007 at 2:25 am
As I was reading about the expression “言葉を濁す” in the text, I started wondering if there is a corresponding English expression like “muddying one’s words”. I would be happy to see it given a citizenship in English if it isn’t already.
We have language to communicate, but when you think about it, quite often it is not best to make things as clear as possible. How often do we try to blur the content of our speech? Maybe in our daily life, we are trying to “muddy” our words more often than to make things crystal clear.
November 10th, 2007 at 5:47 am
I wasn’t sure if English speakers refer to “muddied words” or not, so I did a Net search. The closest thing I found doesn’t use “muddy” at all but does address the notion of intentionally vague words, and I found it quite interesting:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Buzz_words
The key point of relevance to our discussion here seems to be this part of the Wikipedia entry:
“Buzzwords can also function to control thought by being intentionally vague. In management, stating organizational goals by using words with unclear meanings prevents anybody from questioning the directions and intentions of these decisions, especially if many such words are used.” Examples given: dynamic, empowerment, and paradigm.
Reminds me of one of my favorite lyrics from the group Tool:
“He’s got a lot to say. He’s got a lot of nothing to say.”
November 11th, 2007 at 4:00 am
Thak you for connecting us to a very interesting site. It seems to give a well-balanced view on buzz-words; mostly negative with some charitable aspects.
I would have thought that naming them “fuzz-words” might be better than buzz-words. The site seems to have big business management first on the list of “favorite customers”, but politicians should come first, don’t you think?
Anyway, being able to talk (or write) for a reasonably long time without saying anything should definitely be considered a great talent in many areas besides politics and big business.
November 11th, 2007 at 4:56 am
Fuzz words: HA! Love it!