So Much to Say: Part 2
Friday, October 19th, 2007
| Quick Links Welcome to Kanji Curiosity | The Basics | Glossary |
I recently had the great pleasure of interviewing a Japanese architect (in English!) for an article about architecture. Again and again, he returned to a core fact of Japanese existence: nonverbal communication. He noted that, being Japanese, he conveys thoughts and feelings without words, a habit that ultimately caused an impasse in his marriage to a chatty American.
He nevertheless spoke to me for hours about his inner life. Out came a waterfall of words about insecurities and humiliations, wartime suffering, learning disabilities, divorces, tragic deaths, anger at a parent, and much more, all of it deeply moving. Unless I missed something, he didn’t employ nuance or indirection. He said quite clearly whatever what was on his mind. It makes sense that he has learned to do this after living in California for a half century. It also makes sense that he became chatty during an interview. But … he was so good at expressing his feelings! Could this have been the first time?
|
Anecdote
So silent I when Love was by |
When I asked whether he thinks he still communicates nonverbally, he responded that because Japanese culture shaped him indelibly in his early years, he remains very much a nonverbal communicator. It’s a habit he can’t break. And he said I would know this if I ever lived with him (a possibility that we did not explore further!).
I did see his nonverbal side when I asked about his architecture. “It’s very difficult to verbalize and communicate,” he said. I’ve heard other architects be similarly reticent about their work; one told me that he designs precisely because he can’t put his creative impulses into words. So I asked the Japanese architect whether that’s what he meant. No, he said, referring once again to his ingrained habit of nonverbal communication.
The more he spoke, the more confused I felt about that concept.
Sweet Talk, Muddy Words, and the Naked Truth
Last week we began talking about 言葉 (kotoba: word, speech, language). If we look at expressions containing 言葉, maybe we’ll gain a better sense of how the Japanese view the art of conversation (or nonconversation, as the case may be). But first, let’s examine what English speakers say about the topic:
• Actions speak louder than words.
• A picture is worth a thousand words.
• An intellectual is a man who takes more words than necessary to tell more than he knows. (Dwight D. Eisenhower)
Posted by Eve Kushner in Kanji Curiosity | 8 Comments »
